I've mentioned before that my father's family are Native American. My mother and father divorced when I was twelve. From the divorce, as an adult, I can see that I was deprived of all of my heritage and deep family ties. Any connection to my Native American heritage and to my deep southern roots were gone. I have always felt that this was a loss. I love my mom and do not fault her for this situation because it was what it was, but, I have longed for this reconnect that has taken place over the past few years, particularly this past six months. I've spent years looking for any genealogy tidbits that I could, having very little knowledge of where to even start because for years, I didn't even know my great grandparents' names. I've wondered about the details of my Native American history. And I've longed to learn more of my roots before my granddad's generation have all passed. So, my trip to North Carolina was more than just seeing my Dad. It was about making those connections, which is exactly what has happened. I've reconnected with my cousin,Kent and his family, been able to visit three greats who are in their 80s and 90s and have seen second cousins that I remember from my young childhood years. Outstanding!
And I've been able to reconnect with my Native American ancestry, the Lumbee Indians. They have a fascinating history, some of which is taught in American history classes as Sir Walter Raliegh's Lost Tribe. They are the largest tribe east of the Mississippi River. Last year, after several years of closed enrollment, the rolls were reopened for members to register. This was something that I've looked into before over the years but it was never possible. It has to be done in person, it requires written application, as well as a personal interview with the tribal director. When I learned that the rolls were going to be temporarily opened this year, Liza and I had both hoped to be able to do this while in NC this fall, but our hopes were quickly shot down when we were told to call them next May and that maybe we could get an appointment to apply then. Sadness.
While home last week, this issue came up several times in conversation and... very long story short, several miracles or tender mercies occurred. Liza and I were able to get into the tribal council director for an appointment. We filled out pages of information, including a pedigree chart, for the application and were actually interviewed/tested on the history of the area and the tribe. More miracles occurred and we passed! Our photos were taken and we are now officially members of the Lumbee Tribe! And just as exciting, while sitting in the office of the director, I happened to notice our family pedigree chart on her computer monitor and found a generation that I've searched for for years! Indeed, another tender mercy! It was so exciting!
Another amazingtender mercy was that while we were taking our photos for our Tribal Membership, somehow scrapbooking came up, then journaling, then family history and another little miracle took place. Somehow, I mentioned that we'd walked a specific cemetery several times the day before looking for my great grandfather. I mentioned him by name and the lady who'd taken our photo said, "He's not buried there. He's buried at this cemetery." I thought, "HOW in the world would she know that." As I was thinking it, she pulled out a photograph in a book showing me that my great grandfather was, indeed, buried next to his brother, Peter. I was stunned and asked, HOW? It turned out that this sweet lady had written a book listing every grave and headstone in the county! An inch and a half thick book with dates and names and locations. I walked away with a copy of the book in my arms. Truly a gift! It has everything I've been looking for for years!
After this whole process, which took hours, we took Dad home for a nap and Liza and I went to the Lumbee Museum at the college. It was intriguing, especially learning about the unique dialect of the Lumbees. (Doug's still teasing me about my southern accent! I remind him that this was how I "tawked" when I was a little girl and learned to speak!) Liza and I spent some time visiting with Aunt Sue, stopping by to see Ronda and Megan and then took our own little trip out to the cemetery where I'd had so much success getting family history last spring.
We got back to Dad's in time for dinner. We stopped in to see another "cousin", Marvin, who we'd missed several attempts of visiting with. That ten minutes was short and sweet, but awesome! Dad took Liza and I out for a bite at a local burger joint, where we experienced one of the best burgers either of us had ever tasted. Liza said that this was reason enough alone to bring Buddy back to NC!
Kelley, Megan, Liza and Aunt Sue
After dinner, we went over to Kent and Ronda's to say goodbye to everyone, since we were planning on leaving early in the morning. We laughed and teased and had a wonderful visit. We were welcomed into their home with a gift of "moon pies" to take home as a congratulations for being the newest members of the Lumbee tribe.
Megan and Dad teased back and forth so much. Just the way she says, "Uncle Buddy" is adorable! I love watching my dad be surrounded by so much love! Kent teased Liza when she said that she'd never tasted sweet tea (again, LDS do not drink tea). Kent told her, "Give me your Lumbee card back! You can't be a Lumbee if you haven't tasted sweet tea!" We didn't want to leave. We didn't want to say goodbye. Before we left, Liza and her cousins had agreed that they will be meeting in Las Vegas this summer!
We sat up and visited for a bit with Dad when we got back to Aunt Verlie's, but didn't make it a late night because Liza and I had a big day ahead of us. I think that it was when we climbed into bed that it hit me that I was going to be saying goodbye to not only Dad and the family, but to Liza by the end of the day. Sadness.
Tuesday morning, we were up, packed and, after going out for breakfast with Dad and saying goodbye, on the road to Raleigh in a downpour. I'd mentioned to Doug on the phone that we really should consider looking into real estate in North Carolina. I could live there in a heartbeat! However. When we awoke on Tuesday morning, it was sooooo dang humidthat I was ready to head back to my lovely Deseret, Utah! I'm so not a humidity fan! I think that the humidity was a gift to get my head out of the clouds. Sorta. ;)
Saying goodbye to Dad was bittersweet. He's planning on coming out to visit us next. He had been so ill this time that I was concerned about leaving him . Two days ago, while we were on the phone. He said, "I miss my girls." I told him that we missed him too. He said that he'd woken up early that morning and walked past his bathroom down the hall to "our room" to check on us and remembered as he got to the door, "They're not here." That made me teary-eyed. I love my dad.
Liza and I had a smooth flight home. We both were so exhausted that we slept a bit on they flight to Phoenix. However, when the pilot announced that we had landed twenty minutes early, Liza texted Buddy that second and he was at the airport gate to pick us up the minute we walked out the doors. It was 104 degrees! I'm also not a heat fan! But, Liza was in heaven! We left the airport and took a whirlwind trip to Liza and Buddy's cute new apartment (loved it!), took a walk around the grounds, made a quick sandwich for the road and they took me back to the airport. The rush of it all made our goodbye a little easier.
I was so excited to catch a few hugs from Buddy and very happy that Oops, our/Liza's poodle went nuts when I walked in their door! BUT. My favorite thing in Phoenix was "the kiss". Liza and Buddy, since the day that they were married have the cutest little tradition of kissing before they get out of the car. Even if they are both getting out to walk inside someplace together, they give each other a little peck. Liza had me sit in the front seat and when we pulled up to their complex, he turned around and she leaned forward for the kiss. When we got back to the airport and they both got out of the car to hug me goodbye at the doors of the airport, again, "the kiss". It's great to see that my daughter is so happy and so in love. Dad commented on that several times during the week, "She sure loves Buddy, doesn't she!?" HAPPINESS!
My flight home was uneventful. Thankfully! I rode next to a retired couple from Heber Valley Utah and took some beautiful photos of the clouds for Gracie, my little weather girl. The shuttle driver was pleasant and friendly. The other passenger was the owner of an international furniture company, visiting his 94 year old mother in Logan. (Ironically, we were on the same shuttle last spring! He visits her twice a year.) Everyone was was sleeping when I got home at 11PM. I didn't wake anyone but Doug did get up to give me a kiss and welcome me home, then went straight back to bed. I was happy to find the house spotless and company clean, a little gift waiting on the table for me (Season 3 of Castle) and Go-Go, who couldn't stop sniffing Oops' scent on my clothes. He knew who I'd been petting besides him!
The entire trip was perfect. I wouldn't change a thing other than having Dad feel better, but he did pretty well considering the fact that he was in the hospital for a stroke when we got on the plane to head that direction! My family rocks! Plain and simple! And we're making up for a lifetime of being apart now. I love them all so much! I appreciate their hospitality and open arms, not to mention all of that delicious southern cooking!
I've received so many emails requesting recipes. I will share them as I learn to make them myself. As Aunt Sue told me how to make her amazing pound cake, she said things like, "A little of this" and a "handful" of that. I'll be writing things down as I perfect them but I am going to start cooking a little southern for my babes. Monday's project is to learn to make "Chow-Chow". It's something between a relish and a salsa, only with cabbage and green tomatoes. Should be interesting to see how it turns out. Ronda's was divine!
I can't even begin to express the gratitude that I feel for these six days, for my Dad, for my family and for my heritage. Life is good. Enough said.
A people without the knowledge of their past history, origin and culture is like a tree without roots.
I've been away myself for the past week and am now getting "caught up" on reading your blog. Your story is amazing! God is indeed merciful!
Posted by: Pamela K. | Tuesday, September 27, 2011 at 03:29 PM
Such a wonderful trip and such great memories, you are blessed! With all these memories from your family in North Carolina, maybe you should start scrapbooking again...
Posted by: Nicole | Monday, September 26, 2011 at 05:53 PM
It sounds like a fabulous time and I'm so glad you got to go with Liza. I have some "chow chow" in my refrigerator right now!
Posted by: Kip | Monday, September 26, 2011 at 03:55 PM
Family History. I am amazed at your story and sat weeping as I read. There aren't words to say 3 cheers, congratulations, what miracles. so....all the above and more
Posted by: susan | Monday, September 26, 2011 at 02:52 AM